Tuesday, April 08, 2014

Twins' first day apart



Today Margaret and Emily spent their very first day apart EVER!  And they will be 18 months next Monday.

Emily went downtown to spend the day with my mil.  She also went on her very first bus AND skytrain rides today, it was a big day for her!!   I was nervous about the day, not because I didn’t think the girls could handle being separated or that Emily wouldn’t be happy to spend the day with her nana, but because I knew I’d get homesick for her.  And I did!!  But it was manageable, and interesting to spend the day as if I had 2 singletons!

Watching Emily go off in the stroller with her Daddy this morning was hard, she just looked so adorable all bundled up, I wanted to take her out and give her tons of kisses.  As James started turning the stroller away from the front door to start walking, Emily waved and yelled out, ‘Byyyyyeeeee!’  It was so cute.  Margaret was with me, and when I closed the door she started to cry and kept pointing at the door.  At first I thought it was because she missed her sister but I think the real reason she was crying was because she didn’t understand why she wasn’t going, too!  Like, wth Mommy, I want to go on an adventure with Daddy!  LOL  She gets to go next time.  We had to choose one baby to be the first, and I chose Emily because it seemed as though everyone (James and my mil) were automatically assuming it would be Margaret first, and I had to question why.  She went with James to Safeway a few weeks ago for about half an hour, which previous to today was the longest time the girls had ever been separated in their lives.  OK, it was only a half hour trip to a store she goes to often enough with me and her siblings, but still, just because she’s the eldest daughter (by a whopping 6 minutes, ha!), that shouldn’t mean she always gets to do things first!  So that’s how it came to be that Emily got first dibs on a day downtown.

So off they went and apparently Emily did amazingly well on the trip into town (about 40 minutes with one bus transfer).  She did well all day, napped at her usual time, went to the pool in the building, had fun trying on (and sometimes breaking, oops) nana’s necklaces.  She did well on the way home, too, and everything was so new to her being on the skytrain so she didn’t show signs of falling asleep on the way (which I was worried might happen).  She seemed happy to see me when she got home, and I wanted to smother her in kisses, but ultimately she just came in and it was as if she’d never left.  She looked like a bit of a big shot in her pj pants and her purple jacket when she came in and started walking towards the gate where Margaret was.  They sort of touched hands for a second at the gate but then when I opened it and thought they’d have a little ‘conversation’, Margaret just walked past her and into the dining room!  LOL

Margaret was a little more out of sorts without her sister, at least in the morning.  Or out of sorts because she didn’t get to go, too, I don’t know.  She did, however, enjoy lots of morning cuddle time with me, which is usually very much shared between both girls so I think she liked having that one on one time.  Then just before 10am she went to the gate by the stairs and said, ‘Nigh nigh, Nigh nigh.’  Usually they go night night for their nap at 11-1130am, NEVER before 10!  But she seemed genuinely tired and when I asked if she was sure she wanted to go she nodded fervently and said, ‘Yah.’  So I took her up for her nap and tucked her in as usual and she went straight to sleep for about an hour and a half (which is their usual amount of time to sleep, generally speaking, although sometimes it’s less). 

I spent nap time hanging out with Andrew, watching a Mister Maker DVD we got out at the library recently, and then we played a bit of Lego Star Wars on the Xbox, which we borrowed from my parents as a treat for a few days.  After nap time we still had several hours before my aunt and uncle were coming over for a visit, so I decided to take the TWO kids for a walk to the store to get a dessert for the visit.  I wore Margaret in the Ergo and Andrew walked and it was actually pretty amazing to be able to just go for a walk without a stroller, I must say.  I really got a taste for what having 2 singletons would have been like, which I have to say is FAR less complicated than having twins (but I do love my twins, of course!)

After getting a couple of things at the store (mainly an apple pie for dessert, which turned out to be quite good FYI!) we stopped by the park nearby and I was initially hoping Andrew would see how wet it was and want to leave, but he wanted to play, and then Margaret started fussing in the Ergo because SHE wanted to play so I gave in and took her out and let her run around.  There was a HUGE puddle under the playground, basically covering the entire base of it, so I thought it would get in the way of them playing, but it ended up being the most fun thing to them.  They were both completely drenched by the time we had to go!  Margaret was just wearing slipper type shoes and had her feet soaked within 10 seconds of being there, and eventually waded into the water and it was halfway up to her knees it was so deep!  They had a blast running around in it, and Andrew made a game of getting as soaked as possible and laughed gleefully while literally rolling around in the water.  It was a bit of a gong show but lots of fun, and we live so close to the park that I didn’t think twice about letting them get that wet, since we would be home in 2 minutes and they could have a tubby to clean off and warm up, which they did.

It was still slightly challenging with just one toddler and Andrew, but nothing in comparison to having Andrew and twins, because I literally would not feel comfortable doing what we did there with both babies at once and just me.  Margaret kept wanting to climb the actual playground but I didn’t want her to because it was slippery and there were way too many places she could fall from.  She’s too young to understand about being careful on something like that.  Luckily after a few times of pulling her off and saying no, she was fine with just splashing around in the puddle.  But if Emily had been there, too, it’d have been extra challenging to keep both of them away from climbing, especially if they went to separate areas of the playground to do so.  And it’s a small playground I’m talking about, but still big enough that 2 toddlers, one adult, plus a 5 year old, it’s just too much to take on!  So I’m REALLY glad we got out for that little adventure, just the 3 of us, and I was able to give Margaret a chance to enjoy the park the way all kids should get to on a regular basis.

When all was said and done, it was a good day.  I definitely notice where twins truly are double the work load, and it’s definitely a whole lot easier to keep track of one toddler than two.  But there are other ways it’s not easier, because the girls are used to having each other around so because we were at home doing our usual routine, there were times when I noticed Margaret missing the companionship of her sister, particularly when Andrew would be in the kitchen with me.  Usually she and Emily would be in the living room together, but it was just her, and I do think there was a slight adjustment.  I also found it challenging because Emily usually rats Margaret out when she’s being mischievous by saying, ‘Uh oh!’ a lot, so I know to check on them if I hear that LOL.  Without Emily there, I had to be extra aware of what Margaret might get up to!  I also find that while it was certainly easier to do an outing, over all I am so used to having twins that I found myself constantly thinking Emily was with us, or at home I kept thinking she was upstairs and would start crying any second.  I’m conditioned to always be aware of that extra baby, so it did feel a bit strange without her today, and even though one baby is easier, I really missed my little Baby B today =)  I’m glad she had a fun adventure, though.  It’s important for them to feel like individuals (although truthfully, they’re so different that I don’t think it’s possible for them NOT to feel like individuals!)

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