Tired and Hungry...And a bit of a rant!
I wrote this December 5th but never got around to posting...
I really appreciate that people want to visit and spend time with the babies, I really do. And I don’t want to turn people away because I know they mean well, and how could I possibly say no to spending time with my darling children?!! However, I have to admit I’m finding the visiting getting to be a bit much. I’m just so ridiculously tired by the time people ARRIVE – to sit and socialize can become almost painful. I don’t mean it in a bad way, I’m happy to see everyone who comes over (well, for the most part, lol), it’s just the sleep deprivation (SD) talking. If it wasn’t for the SD, all would be well.
My aunt was over the entire afternoon, and now I’m expecting my mil and a friend of hers who wants to meet the babies. Which is all fine and dandy, I’m just suffering from extreme SD and can barely think straight, let alone start a second round of visiting now.
At least I did tell James that I wasn’t up to cooking dinner tonight, so they’re bringing food. That’s something to consider, if you’re ever going to visit someone with a new baby (or babies) – bring food, pretty please!! I am in a bit of a predicament these days because I am so busy feeding all the kids that I sometimes neglect to take care of myself with regards to eating. I will realize that I am bordering on dying from hunger sometimes (only slightly exaggerating) but it’s so hard to find the time or energy to fix myself something after everyone else is taken care of. I know I HAVE to eat, and I do (I can’t not!), especially since I’m nursing and to keep my supply up I do have to eat. BUT it’s SO challenging. What’s even more challenging? Having a seemingly constant stream of guests coming and feeling guilty because I SHOULD be offering snacks to them, but I can’t, because I’m barely able to feed myself so how can I be expected to feed anyone else right now (other than my children)?! Seriously. I was making an effort to have things on the ready for when people came over, and I found it was really adding to my stress level and wasn’t healthy for me. So I offer something to drink now but not food. I don’t mean to starve people, but the fact is, I’M STARVING, and given that people are apparently coming over to ‘help out’ with the babies, it would make sense for them to bring food so that’s one less thing on my list of things I’m not getting done because I’m too tired and too busy.
My aunt did bring muffins, and I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, because people HAVE done stuff for us. But I am finding more and more that while I DO appreciate people holding one of the babies for me, it really doesn’t help my exhaustion level at all – especially when I still have another baby to hold! And while I do enjoy some adult conversation and seeing people who didn’t necessarily see me entirely often before the babies arrived, when you’re suffering badly from SD it’s not always easy to hang out for hours on end.
I don’t really have a solution – I want people to spend time with the kids because they’re so precious and won’t be little for long. I’m just so freaking tired…and hungry! lol