A few more things off the list

Today I went to Ikea and got a white Lack shelf (the ‘floating’ kind of shelf) that will go above the babies’ crib for their stuffed animals and other light stuff.  It can also have the mobile attached from the bottom, which is what we did with Andrew’s Lack shelf when he had his nursery.  I also got a baby change table, which has 2 shelves underneath for ample storage, but won’t take up as much space as what a full bureau would.  And it was a lot cheaper than a bureau would be.  So I felt good about that purchase.

The annoying thing is that I couldn’t carry the damn stuff up from the van, and truth be told even if I COULD, I don’t have the energy to put the table together.  I managed OK getting the stuff into the cart and from the cart into the van, but honestly just doing that, I could feel a pulling sort of sensation in my lower abdomen (not that I really have an abdomen these days, or at least not any muscles in it!!) and I was completely exhausted.  I can’t say enough how frustrating it is to be feeling this debilitated so early in the pregnancy compared to a singleton pregnancy.  So sorry if I keep complaining about it, but it’s really on my nerves.  There’s so much I want to be doing, so much I feel like I COULD be doing…if only I could muster the strength and energy.  But I just can’t!  It was all I could do just to walk through Ikea and purchase those few items.  I desperately needed to sit down several times throughout the excursion, and it’s not like I was there long or doing lots of extra walking, since I knew where I needed to go to look for the specific items I wanted.

At least the stuff has been purchased, so I can get James or my dad to help me with putting things together and setting things up.  There’s still more stuff that I really DO need to do on my own though, so I’ll get the energy from somewhere and tackle it in the next few days!

I definitely feel the babies kicking and punching and moving about, but I can’t say as I’m totally aware of just how BIG each baby is in there.  What I sometimes forget is that there is also double the placenta from a singleton pregnancy.  I’ve got one at the back and one at the front.  Between that and double the fluids in there, it’s no wonder I’m feeling winded even when I’m just sitting doing nothing.  I can literally feel right out of breath like I’ve been moving quickly even though I haven’t been, and it’s all because babies are pressing into all my insides.  It’s just so weird how the inside of the body doesn’t have the same feeling as the outside, because I don’t necessarily FEEL it all happening, yet I’m experiencing side effects of it!  For some reason I find that really strange and sometimes confusing, even though I do understand the concept of it!

James is going away tonight for 2 nights, so the boy and I are on our own for a bit.  Although I’ll have a night to myself because Andrew is going to sleep over at my parents’ tomorrow night.  Because of my need for sleep and the sickness/zombie-ism I feel when I don’t get enough rest, our usual routine these days is that James gets up with Andrew in the night, (it takes 2 seconds to get him to go back to sleep, but just waking up for that length of time makes it hard for me to get back to sleep for ages afterwards) and when he first gets up in the morning.  So I get up just before 7:30 when Andrew wakes me up after James leaves for work, or on the weekend I sleep in a bit.  Our system works, since James goes to bed several hours earlier than I do in the evening.  Anyway, I realized with him being away for several nights, the onus would be on me to get up for all these wake-up calls.  Ultimately, I have to be prepared to function on very little sleep tomorrow.  I’m going to try to go to sleep earlier than my usual, but I don’t foresee it working out very well…So Andrew will be with me tonight, but my parents tomorrow night, since my dad gets up super early anyway so it doesn’t matter if the boy is up at the crack of dawn on Saturday!

I’m feeling pretty happy these days, enjoying being pregnant despite the negatives of sore and tired.  I just feel so pressed for time…Maybe it’s just in my nature to always sort of feel that way though?  I mean, there’s always something going on that makes time ‘of the essence’ right?  And then throw in double pregnancy hormones and I’m just sort of wound like a top (yet without the energy to actually spin, haha!)

Everything that needs to get done WILL get done, and I know that…and the other stuff will keep, it’s really not that big a deal.  I’m just not used to thinking about all the stuff I want to do but not actually being able to follow through on it all.  I want to take charge and get ‘er done!


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