Thursday, November 17, 2011

Another dr's appointment...


I have my doctor’s appointment today and I’m sooooo nervous.

I’m getting my flu shot (which I’m not nervous about), and I’m going over the results of my ultrasound from the day of my miscarriage (which is making me feel sick just to think about).  I’ll be glad when we’ve talked about it and that’s over with.  I doubt very much the doctor will be able to tell me anything more than what the ultrasound doctor did, but maybe I have an inkling of hope that he will have more of an explanation than they did at the hospital.  Truthfully, I WANT it to show that actually they DID get a picture with the baby in it, but I know that’s just a stupid dream of mine that won’t come true.  It still doesn’t sit well with me that they told me, ‘It appears that a baby never developed at all’ and then a few hours later, MY FULLY FORMED (albeit tiny) BABY CAME OUT OF ME. 

Take a deep breath, Elizabeth!!!!!

I think I just need to get the appointment over with…I feel stressed because I also feel the need to ask the doctor WHY I was forgotten about and a counselling appointment was never even made for me.  I also have to find out about the gynaecologist appointment, because I got another call back the other day and it truly is a 6-7 month wait to see someone.  Ridiculous!  It’s a good thing I don’t suspect there’s something wrong with me, because if I did I’d be panicked at the thought of having to wait half a year to see someone about it. 

I hate going to the doctor now and I’m dreading this appointment, but at least by tonight it will be all over with and hopefully I won’t have to go back for a long time.

1 comment:

tristadawn said...

hi Liz!
thinking of you and hope your appointment went well. xoxo.



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