Oh, crap

No pun intended here (ok, maybe it’s very much intended), but with all the shit I’m going through, one ‘good’ thing is that Andrew appears to be self-potty training!

He has peed on the potty once in a while, but never got the hang of it enough that I felt comfortable leaving him out of a diaper without fear he’d have an accident.  Not saying he won’t ever have an accident still, but he’s doing so awesome. 

Several days ago he decided he wanted to go naked, and when he undressed he decided he needed to do a poop on the toilet.  This was a breakthrough moment because he was doing it of his own accord.  I didn’t encourage it, given what I’ve been going through I could care less about working on potty training at the moment.  But he’s making major progress and he’s doing it all on his own.

The past few days, he has barely needed any diaper changes, and when he has one on and takes it off to go use the potty, I can put him back in the same diaper later because he hasn’t wet in it at all.  He’s still doing some jobs in his diapers but for the most part, he’s naked and loving the freedom of just running to the bathroom when he needs to go.  He even remembers to flush!  He’s always so proud of himself afterwards, and loves getting a high five from Mommy for his efforts.  He now says after our high five, ‘You proud of me?!’

I have moments (too many of them) where I feel so sorry for myself and just want to be completely alone to try to deal with my feelings, or to just sink right into them and not allow anything else to get in.  But I do appreciate so much that Andrew forces me to think about other things, even if it happens to be his pees and poos.  He’s getting to be a big boy, and I AM proud of him for accomplishing new things, especially all on his own without anyone even strongly encouraging it.  Of course, now that he’s making a habit of it we ARE encouraging it, but I think it’s pretty cool that he decided for himself that it’s ‘time’ to start using the potty. 

His current favourite tv show is called Super Why! and it’s more for slightly older kids since it’s all about teaching kids how to read, but I think it’s great that he’s obsessing over it.  He’s so quiet during that 25 minutes as well….aaaahhhhhh…..Hence why I have the time to write this post!

I’m still one-track-minded thinking about losing my baby, but I feel a little guilty not giving any focus to the things Andrew is doing.  So while it’s kind of shitty (ha ha), I wanted to write a post about his new big boy attitude toward doing his business. 


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