Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Good night my angel

We went to Ikea on Sunday and I was excited to get Andrew a toy box. I got some cute decals from the kids section too, and put them on the toy box to make it more personalized and fun. Now all his little toys fit into one box so when he goes to bed I can have a few hours of a much cleaner looking living room. lol

I was concerned how it would go having baby with us while we shopped but it actually worked out really well. He had some macaroni and cheese at the cafeteria, then we put him in the seat of the shopping cart (his first time doing that!) to go around the showroom. We’d got him some toys and he managed to fling one thing right out of the package and all the pieces went flying but it wasn’t too bad collecting it up! I nursed him before we went downstairs, he fell fast asleep, and he slept through the entire shop in the downstairs area! It was glorious.

We didn’t get any major items or anything, just little odds and ends. It was his toy box that I wanted most of all! And a shelf to hold all our gd tass =) Which looks really good, if I do say so myself.

I made hummus tonight and it’s quite tasty. Andrew LOVES hummus! He had quite a bit of it as a late night snack. He also had some little pieces of tortilla chip with it. Then he had a small plum and some vanilla custard mixed with a bit of rice cereal. So at least he did eat something tonight. He’s been SO fussy and it’s because he’s teething. I haven’t been able to open his mouth up enough to see which tooth is coming in but it’s very obvious that teething is the issue. I feel so bad for him when there’s really nothing I can do to make him feel better. I put the Baby Orajel on sometimes but it doesn’t seem to do a whole lot. I guess I should reconsider giving him Baby Tylenol. I haven’t given it to him at all yet, but I guess if he seems to be feeling worse it might help. I’ve resisted giving it to him – there are mixed opinions on how good it is to give to babies and I don’t want to give it to him if he doesn’t really need it.

He’s finally gone to sleep. He was resisting sleep for the longest time, despite how tired I knew he was. Finally I rocked him and played the Billy Joel lullaby ‘Goodnight my Angel’ about 5 times and sung it to him softly and he fell asleep. The cd of the song came with the book and it’s actually really quite sweet and soothing.

These are the lyrics:

*Verse 1*
Good night my angel time to close you eyes
And save these questions for another day
I think I know what you've been asking me
I think you know what I've been trying to say

I promised I would never leave you
And you should always know
Where ever you may go
No matter where you are
I never will be far away

*Verse 2*
Good night my angel now it's time to sleep
And still so many things I want to say
Remember all the songs you sang for me
When we went sailing on an emerald bay

And like a boat out on the ocean
I'm rocking you to sleep
The water's dark and deep
Inside this ancient heart
You'll always be a part of me

(Musical Bridge)
Do do do do...

*Verse 3*
Goodnight my angel now it's time to dream
And dream how wondeful your life will be
Someday your child will cry and if you sing this lullaby
Then in your heart there will always be a part of me

Someday we'll all be gone
But lullabies go on and on
They never die that's how you and I will be

Soup and a swim

I made a delicious Minestrone style soup about an hour ago and I’ve left it simmering on the stove. I love a good hearty soup, and now that the fall weather is here it will be comforting to have a hot meal for supper. I love making soup, most especially Minestrone, because it’s so easy, healthy, and fairly fool-proof (well, I made a few soup blunders in the past, but I learned from my mistakes!)

In this soup I put carrots, potato, turnip, green beans, a can of ‘bean medley’, stewed tomatoes, diced tomatoes, peas, little pasta noodles, onion, and garlic (and of course veggie stock and water - lol!) Add a little pepper and whatever else you might fancy (I added a pinch of dried basil) and Bob’s your uncle!

I love just throwing it all in the pot and seeing it magically turn into a delicious soup!

Luckily Andrew was a good boy and let Mommy get the soup started without grumping. I love his new House toy we got him because when he’s playing with it, he’s often pressing the various buttons for music etc so I know he isn’t being mischievous when I can hear what he’s doing!

(As a side note, yesterday I took apart and put away his Jolly Jumper…It felt like the end of an era! I can’t believe my lil guy is grown out of his JJ already!)

I want to start cooking better and being able to put the energy in to making new meals. I make good, healthy meals most of the time, I just want to make new dishes so we don’t get sick of having the same things all the time. It’s tough because I don’t really have that much preparation time for meals given that Andrew doesn’t like me to be in the kitchen for tooooo long. But where there’s a will, there’s a way!

It’s getting interesting now that he’s eating more solids. He still only eats a small amount but he does like to have some of whatever we’re eating. So I want to get as many good nutrients into him as possible. I need to come up with meals that are easy and quick to make but also nutritious and things Andrew can also sample! I know in the earlier years it’s likely I’ll have to make two meals – one for James and me, another for Andrew. But given how little he eats right now and the fact that he only seems interested in eating what we have on our own plates, I don’t want to go through the trouble of making two meals when he’ll only have two bites of it, if that.

His swimming lesson went well today. I was so tempted to skip out and stay home because he was up through the night and awake just after 6am. But despite how exhausted I was feeling, it was showing signs of being sunny out so I wanted to take advantage of the weather and get out. If I was exhausted AND it was pouring rain, I might feel more inclined to stay in. But ultimately when am I NOT exhausted when the day begins, right?! If I never took us out because I was feeling tired, we’d never leave this apartment building!! And really, once we got out I felt more energetic. I have a good route for getting to the pool and I enjoy the morning walk. Andrew is good, doesn’t fuss, and he loves his swim lesson so it makes it all worth it. Although today they had to put on flotation devices and it was absolutely HILARIOUS the look Andrew got on his face when it was on! When I zipped it up it squished his cheeks out so they were even chubbier than usual and he went all stiff and got this funny look on his face. Even another mom couldn’t stop laughing at how ridiculous he looked! The other babies weren’t doing that! He was the first one out of the jacket because he couldn’t stand being in it. We’ll have to practice till he’s comfortable with it. He hates getting clothes put on so having a big bulky jacket thing put on must have felt like torture! lol He’s so funny.

I need a nap, it’s only just past 2 and I am crashing. Andrew’s asleep so now is my chance…It might be short-lived so I’d better snap it up while it’s here!

Saturday, September 26, 2009


James went to Victoria today. I got up when he brought the boy to me for a feed and he kissed me goodbye. It’s a short trip but still I miss him. Especially at night time when it’s quiet and Andrew has gone to bed. I’m not used to being alone. It’s good for me though, this time on my own to just think and be in my own head. I actually don't worry about being alone like I once did. Maybe it's a maturity thing, or maybe it's because I'm not actually alone! I have Andrew =)

He had play time this morning and then we met up with my mom for coffee. Andrew enjoyed having some of the foam from my latte! Then my mom looked after Andrew here at the apartment while I went and got my hair cut. I need the roots touched up too but I opted to just get a cut this time and in another month I will get the colour done too. I’m thinking maybe of doing something different with the colour next time but I’m not sure yet. Maybe I need a change. The cut is the same, just re-done and it feels sooo good to have it thinned out and texturized again. My hair is TOO thick. Too thick is better than too thin but seriously, I really have too much hair and when it’s a shorter style I’m going with it really shows as it’s growing in. But anyway, it feels good to have it done. I would go with a different style but this one is perfect for me right now. I like the way it looks and it is super low maintenance, which suits my lifestyle!

It was nice to get out on my own for a bit, though I didn’t do anything after the haircut. Just came home. My mom had a great time with Andrew while I was out – lots of play time and then he slept while cuddling her for quite a while. He loves his Gramma =)

I made us some lunch and we hung out here for a while, then went to the hotel so I could take Andrew into the pool. It was windy out but we went in anyway – luckily the pool was heated! It was a bit cool when we got out but not too bad actually. And to be going in an outdoor pool in late September in Vancouver – that’s pretty impressive!

Andrew enjoyed the water, although I don’t think he liked having the sun in his eyes. But we had fun splashing around and I got him practicing his Rocket Ship and Starfish holds from swim class. I didn’t dunk him though =D But he did manage to get his face in the water a few times – his own doing, by accident of course – and he didn’t get upset at all. He’s going to love the water so much when he can actually swim. I’m so glad he’s not afraid of the water.

After that we hung out in my mom’s hotel room and after playing and feeding (including eating almost a whole strawberry!) Andrew fell asleep. I brought him home just before 9 and he was quite fussy for a while but now he’s sound asleep in his crib. I’m not too hopeful that he’s going to sleep through, although it sure would be nice…

I am happy on certain levels but I am still feeling sad. Can’t quite shake it just yet. I don’t know, maybe I’m just overtired and need some proper rest in order to see things differently. I know I have to compartmentalize these feelings. I don’t even know what’s causing it. I guess I am just going through a little mini crisis. It isn’t that bad – it could definitely be far worse. I’m not dwelling. I just sort of feel blah when I really get to thinking about certain things and I have cried quite a bit today – when I’ve been alone. I just need to get some feelings out since I so rarely cry.

I’m looking forward to tomorrow though. We have some fun plans, something I’ve been wanting to do for a while. So that’s good.

I think I’ll go have a bubble bath and then maybe read and try to get to sleep early. Although I just realized it’s after 10, which is starting to feel late to me – which is sooooo weird since I am such a night person usually! But 6-7am comes early, even more so when you’re up through the night as well!

Funny how life changes.

A little piece of me

I hate bottling things up inside, but some things are better kept hidden. I don’t hide much but sometimes I just think it’s not worth talking about certain things. Especially when you don’t have the time to really formulate your thoughts on them properly.

So I don’t really know how to approach the subject of a mother’s ‘invisibility’ once she has a child.

For the most part it doesn’t bother me at all. I’m not one to enjoy being in the limelight – I don’t like all eyes on me. I love it when people pay attention to Andrew and would be far more upset if people ignored HIM than me!! He is adorable and a delight and I WANT him to be focused on.

But it’s interesting how even when I get together with people WITHOUT Andrew, I feel somewhat ignored. Not ignored but just…I don’t know. Certain people in my life used to compliment me on things and I’m not saying I never get any compliments anymore but…Even when I wear something brand new for the first time it goes unnoticed. And last night it seemed to be implied that I am carrying extra baby weight still…Or did I just interpret it wrong? (I don’t think so). Here’s how it went down:

‘You’re a vegetarian? I didn’t know that about you!’

‘Yes, it’s been almost 12 years, a long time!’

‘You wouldn’t know she’s a vegetarian to look at her, would you?!’

‘Oh, come on now, she just had a baby!’


I don’t know…given who was saying it I KNOW it wasn’t meant as an attack or meant to say I am fat or anything because this person wouldn’t ever say that to me. But I have definitely noticed that I don’t get treated the same way as I used to. (In general I mean - I'm not just linking this to weight, I guess that's sort of a side issue of a comment that upset me. It was unexpected).

It's not that I want people all fawning over me and complimenting me at every turn, that’s not it at all. But once in a while it would be nice to have something said!

I don’t dress up these days and maybe I’m in a bit of clothing rut, but I WAS actually wearing a new outfit last night and literally everyone else who showed up to the outing was complimented by one another on how they looked…I was the only one not mentioned! Again, I know it was unintentional, but I am just feeling a bit bad about myself at the moment because of it.

I feel really sad actually, and I don’t think it’s just because of that. It just sort of was the clincher maybe. I am normally so good at keeping myself together and I am a fairly happy person these days. But once in a while this feeling just hits me and I just need a good cry. Sometimes I have time to cry, but sometimes I just have to hold back because there isn’t time or it isn’t appropriate. I have to hold it together for the sake of Andrew!

I’ve gained so much having Andrew and feel better than I have my whole life now that he is here. But I don’t want to lost my identity. I’m OK with largely being ‘Mom’ – as it really is my number one job/priority in life right now. But I’m still Elizabeth and I still have individuality as well! I don’t want that to be forgotten. I don’t want to be in the limelight AT ALL but I don’t want to be hidden away in the shadows either. A happy medium would be nice.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Hopeful that a new pattern of SLEEP is forming!

Ahhh, I need to start posting more REGULARLY so I don’t say a zillion things in one post that no one really wants to read about. Instead, it will mean just saying a few things no one wants to read about – Ha! Well, the way I see it is, if you don’t want to read it, WHY ARE YOU?? =P

So anyway…last night was another successful night of sleep! In the late afternoon, when Andrew woke up from his nap, I took him to the hotel lobby nearby and let him crawl around. Oh, first we went to Starbucks and I got a free frapuccino because Andrew was smiling so much =) He crawled around in the lobby (on a carpeted area) for a while and that was good, but then he started getting antsy because there wasn’t really all that much room for him to move around. James said he’d meet us at the park so we went there and Andrew crawled around quite a bit. He also met a dog who he proceeded to pull the fur of…although luckily the dog didn’t seem to mind! The dog owner said she thought it was good that we were letting Andrew explore things on his own and weren’t ‘afraid parents’ who wouldn’t let him try anything. At first I was like that, where I thought oh no, he shouldn’t do that, he can’t do that, ew that’s dirty, he better not touch that! But now, while sure there are times where I say those things (I am his MOM, after all! It’s part of my job!!) I do find myself more and more letting him do things on his own. He needs to explore to learn and as long as I am watching out for his safety, there’s no reason why he should have to be glued to my lap at all times not really getting a sense for anything.

Anyway, getting him out like that was such a good idea – it worked, lets put it that way! We got home and had supper – I made homemade Shepard’s Pie (vegetarian style, of course!) and he LOVED it! LOL A little baby eating Shepard’s Pie…He also had some Zoodles, which he tried for the first time at lunch yesterday and loved. He also ate banana chunks, a plum, and yogurt yesterday! He hated banana before but yesterday he kept opening his mouth up for more, so it’s great to see him liking food more and healthy stuff too!

After dinner he nursed and fell asleep, was in bed around 8. That’s a bit early for him – usually he’d be in bed more around 9, so I wasn’t surprised when he woke up for a feed just before midnight. I was up anyway so it wasn’t a big deal – I was finally getting all the pictures sorted and organized and up to date. So I fed him, he went to sleep, I went to sleep and I didn’t wake up till just after 7! It was James getting up for the day who woke me, Andrew was still quiet! Apparently he was awake when James got up, but he was quietly playing in his crib (how CUTE is that?!) but of course as soon as he saw that Daddy was up, he wanted out of his room!

Anyway, this sleeping through the night business really works for me and I hope SO much that Andrew keeps it up! The trick is tuckering him out through the day. He is BURSTING with energy, you can just tell, and the only way for him to be tired enough to sleep through is to get him really active through the day.

So today after lots of play time at home, I took him to the swings at the park. He was in the swing for quite a while, then we explored a bit more of the playground (though he’s a bit too little for it yet). There was another mom and her baby there and we’d met briefly before at a meet-up so we chatted a bit – our boys are about 4 months apart, hers being the older one. Then we went home, Andrew had some lunch, including Zoodles (not going to be a regular thing but I wanted to use up the tin I’d opened and he seemed to like them, so why not!), cheese crackers, hummus (yes, hummus!) and a plum. Which sounds like a weird combo but he seemed to like it! He washed it all down with some Happy Planet juice – LOL. Well, just a sip, he also had water =)

He napped and I got a few chores done. Then we went to James’ workplace for a company party, an office-warming party since they moved to their new location. I had a glass of wine – the most I’ve drank in quite a while! – and we listened to some music and chatted but then Andrew was getting fussy so I said my goodbyes. Everyone else was going out for dinner but I opted not to because I didn’t want to have to find someone to look after Andrew. I really want to be getting him into a routine of sleeping and I can’t do that if someone else is looking after him. And I’m going out for a ‘girls night’ tomorrow night (although since his dad will be looking after him I’m hoping he’ll continue with a good routine of sleeping!) so I didn’t want to be away from him two nights in a row given he’s not used to that. He does tend to get quite fussy if he doesn’t have his Momma to latch onto at night time! So we came home and he was a tad fussy but had a bit of supper, then did a lot of nursing and now he’s fast asleep.

I have a feeling when James gets home from this dinner thing, he’ll wake up and want to be up for a bit, but hopefully I can have him in bed by midnight so I can get a decent amount of sleep before tomorrow starts…

I’m really going to try to make my blog posts a little shorter and not always just about our day to day stuff. It’s just hard because it’s stuff I really do want to record to look back on – it has already come in handy at times when I wanted to remember exactly when Andrew did some particular thing. I can just go through my archives and oh, yeah, it happened that day! But I do want to write about other things too because I DO have other thoughts and ideas and so on. At least 90% of my life revolves entirely around Andrew right now, I won’t lie. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t more for me to write about! I just have to figure out how to find the time to write this stuff down AND get to the other stuff! I’m working on it…

Catching up...

I’ve written over the past few days but never had a chance to post.

Here is what I wrote on Tuesday:

Yesterday we had swim lessons in the morning. We learned ‘the Starfish hold’ and ‘the Rocket Ship.’ LOL Andrew LOVES the water so much, as soon as he was in the pool he was splashing. I remember in first class the instructor said mom’s don’t have to get their hair wet in this class…Yeah right! Andrew had my hair soaked about 2 minutes in from all his splashing!

The only thing I’m sort of struggling with is getting us changed and ready to leave once class is over. Not that it’s that big a deal, but after getting Andrew changed I have to wrap him in a towel so I can carry him against me without getting him soaked again (the mistake I made first class) to take him to the women’s change room. I have to put him in a play pen in there in order to get changed as quickly as possible. Well yesterday I turned my back literally for one second just to grab my clothes out of my bag and he was wailing…I picked him up, thinking he was just upset that I’d turned away but there was blood all over his tongue. He must have fallen over and bit his tongue. There’s still a big red mark in the middle of his tongue and yesterday after class he had trouble nursing at first, I guess it was too painful to latch on. Poor little guy! So I have to work out a system for getting us changed without him getting injured!! If only we could bring the stroller downstairs, I could strap him in before I get changed but unfortunately the stroller has to stay upstairs.

Anyway, swimming was fun and I love watching Andrew smile and enjoy himself in the water!

I have to get used to seeing so many naked women though…I was a bit taken aback to see so many women just prancing around naked before and after their swim. This isn’t the moms I’m talking about from the baby group – but rather women in the regular women’s change room (not the ‘family’ change room)…They will be completely naked and just sit on the bench and just sit there for a while chatting and whatnot. I’m not freaked out by nakedness (most of the time) but it’s a tad weird – maybe foreign is more the word? It’s foreign to me because for one I don’t usually frequent places where people are going to be naked (I’d probably be one of the last people you’d ever find on Wreck Beach!) and because when I change I do it as quickly as I can…I even put my dress or top on and try to cover my lower half before my underwear go on so hopefully no one sees anything or sees things for the least amount of time possible! I’m not ashamed of my body but I don’t feel the need for everyone to see it either.

Here is what I wrote on Wednesday:

OK so we had swim lessons again this morning. Today the babies got their heads dunked under water! I was nervous about it because I didn’t want to have to be the one to do it to Andrew…but James has dunked him a few times so I wasn’t too worried that he’d be really upset by it. He did so well, he didn’t even whimper. Interesting little tidbit: babies at this age still have the ability to close their nasal passage as they did in the womb. So in teaching them to hold their breath, the first step is to blow into their nostrils, which causes them to close their nasal passages. Then you quickly dunk them under! It all takes just a matter of a second. It’s important not to do it too much though, it’s a gradual learning process. The instructor said not to dunk babies under more than once every 10 minutes when they’re first learning.

Andrew pinched a baby girl while they were playing before class started! Luckily I was watching and peeled his fingers away before she got upset. He’s a bit of a rough-houser! He doesn’t realize his own strength is the thing. He was also obsessed with the ruffles on her swim suit =) It’s so cute watching the babies interact.

Our system after class for getting changed and ready to go was much better this time so I think we’re going to be just fine. I have to race to get myself changed but it really doesn’t take long to throw some clothes on and get going. I don’t dry my hair or anything, which might be more of an issue once it’s much colder weather in October…But my new trick is to give Andrew something to play with in the playpen while I get dressed – and make sure it’s something he hasn’t ever played with before! Today it was my comb…We’ll see what he gets next time! I just need him to be occupied for a couple of minutes so it’s not so bad.

What reeeeally helped was the fact that he SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT last night! It was glorious. He slept from 9pm-6:40am. I went to sleep just after 11 and the alarm was set for 6:50, so I only had to get up 10 minutes earlier than I needed to anyway. I did wake up around 5 thinking OMG we haven’t got up yet, what’s this about, I hope Andrew is OK! I’m just so used to getting up, so it took about 20 minutes or so to fall back asleep. But wow, it makes SUCH a difference getting that proper night’s sleep.

I know exactly why Andrew slept so well too. It’s because we had such a big day yesterday. I took him to our mom/baby group and he was literally on the move for an hour and a half. Just non-stop, racing back and forth from one end of the gym/meeting room to the next. He was chasing a ball for a while, then my water bottle. He was all over the place, also checking out the other babies (none of which can crawl yet so he was going up to them on their blankets!) and their toys =) He was a maniac. I was EXHAUSTED. I was sweating bullets by the end of it. Finally, about 5 minutes till the end, I was able to latch him on and he fell asleep. After all that, he falls asleep right at the end! Always the way…I put him into his stroller and he was so zonked that he didn’t even stir when I transferred him to it. His knees and the tops of his feet were just black from crawling around everywhere!

The session was on sleep, although it didn’t really give me any tips other than to realize what we’re going through with our sleep issues is normal. Every baby is different…One thing I did learn was that for a baby to ‘sleep through the night’ it typically means the baby sleeps for 5 hours in a row. It doesn’t mean an actual full night’s sleep like an adult would like to have! Although personally I have found that when Andrew sleeps ‘through’ it typically means he sleeps for about 6-9 hours straight. So I guess you never know…I don’t think I’d consider 5 hours to be a full night, although I would take it in a heart beat compared to our usual nights of about 3 hour intervals!

The nurses said it’s really a good idea that if a baby is sleeping, LET THEM SLEEP. Of course, there are times when you really have no choice but to wake them when they’re in the middle of a nap, but if you can let them sleep, do so. Andrew has been sleeping for about 2 hours now and I’m tempted to wake him up because I’d rather he sleep through the night than right now, but my plan is that once he wakes, I’ll take him out somewhere and get him crawling around and then he’ll be tired again by tonight =) He is unbelievably energetic so I think the key here is to get as much of it out as possible so by bedtime he’ll be zonked and will forget to wake up for a middle of the night feed! LOL

We got home yesterday and Andrew napped in his stroller for a bit. When he woke up, I gave him a bath to get rid of the filth he had on him and he fed and started napping again. Usually he rarely naps but maybe he’s going to start napping regularly now that he’s moving around more and more. (Which reminds me, he lost nearly half a pound – yesterday he was at 20.8lbs, but it’s normal because he’s so active!) Anyway, then James got home early and off we went to the aquarium. We had signed up for ‘Twilight Night’ a month ago. Basically it’s for members only and largely geared toward children. I thought it would be fun to go to a members only event because it wouldn’t be as crowded – and I can handle lots of kids being around because now that we have a baby, I am WAY more tolerant of the little ones!! It was SO quiet there compared to usual and we were actually able to look at things that normally have crowds around. Such as the jellyfish! We also went to see the 4-D Experience and what we saw of it was REALLY cool – on its own worth going to the aquarium to for sure! It’s basically one of those ‘rides’ where you sit there with 3-D glasses on and watch the show and unexpected things happen…For example, a dolphin comes out of the water and when it splashes back in, water sprays in your face from the seat in front of you.

Can you tell now why I said, ‘what we saw of it’??! Andrew started sobbing when the unexpected things happen, and I’m not surprised that half the audience (including us) left 5 minutes into the show – those of us who left all had younger babies!

Getting Andrew home was a challenge – he was exhausted and wanted to nurse. It was already dark out when we left at about 7:30 – I hate how it’s getting dark so early now! We ended up stopping on a bench along the sea wall and I nursed Andrew till he fell fast asleep and I carried him most of the way home (then transferred him to his Dad since my back was about to break!) and he slept the entire way! He woke up when we got home and had some supper with us (solids – he is actually starting to eat more and show a bit of an interest, yay!) and then he went to bed and the rest is history!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Everything seems just a little bit better when the weather is good

I have the Weather Network on and I just saw that it’s supposed to be nice all the way through next week. Of course, I know the forecast can change any time, but still. The idea that there most likely won’t be rain for a little while yet sounds good to me!

I should be heading to bed but I want to wait till the dishwasher finishes running because it’s making a strange noise so I think I should monitor it. I worry about such things =P

Andrew slept so much today, it was ridiculous. We went to the market and he slept through that, didn’t wake up till we were heading home. He had some play time and enjoyed an audience when we had some friends over for the afternoon. But towards the end of their visit, he nursed and fell asleep and pretty much didn’t wake up for about 4 hours! It might have even been a bit longer. Then he was full of energy, had some cheerios, water, and a few bites of a cinnamon bun (!) and some play time. I figured he’d be up for ages but I just put him into his crib, sound asleep.

We’ll see how long it lasts…
Oh, he broke his mobile this morning! I was sleeping but James caught it on video. It’s priceless. He’s been working at it for a few weeks, maybe longer. He was too short to reach it but kept straining trying to grab at Pooh and friends. Well, he’s taller now obviously, because he was able to grab a hold of Tigger and ripped him right off the mobile! So his crib looks bare now but obviously he’s done with the mobile now. He hasn’t really paid attention to it for a while. He still seems to like his aquarium though (although I bet if he could figure out how, he’d break that, too! I’ve caught him beating on the front of it and pulling at it a few times…)

Oh, baby! What a little scamp he is. But a cute one!

I felt all day like I was coming down with something, and it was all the same symptoms that James had on Thursday and yesterday. Only I also had a super sore throat. My throat is feeling worlds better now and I honestly don’t feel like I’m fighting something anymore. Weird – I wonder what that was all about? Hopefully Andrew doesn’t feel anything from it.

I’ve been thinking about Kyle and Trista today – they are officially MARRIED now! I am so excited for them. I hope they had the most amazing day of their lives so far.

And Chandra celebrated her birthday today – HaPpY BiRtHdAy to you, Chandra-poo!! Hope it was a wonderful day!

I also know another couple who was getting married today (my old bosses from way back)…

It was definitely a day of celebrations!
Now hopefully it will be a night of sleep for meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Thursday, September 17, 2009

More of a calm day...

I’ve spent the past few hours organizing pictures on my computer, trying to downscale the last batch I uploaded from my camera. It’s so time consuming! But at least I got a good chunk of it done.

I feel like I accomplished a lot of little things today. We didn’t do a whole lot in terms of an outing, just went to the pet store to get food and litter for the girls. I got them some catnip as a treat and they lapped it up as soon as I put it in front of them!

Andrew was up twice through the night last night and was more tired today than usual. He napped for about an hour and a half in the early afternoon! I couldn’t believe he slept that long. I was able to get some laundry done, changed the sheets on the bed, dusted the bedroom and did some clothes tidying in there, did some tidying in Andrew’s room. A bunch of little things that were adding up on my ‘to do’ list. It would have been nice to have a nap myself but it’s either sleep or get the stuff done that really does need doing so…At least I wasn’t as tired today as I often am. I was a bit more chipper than I thought I would be today!

N&M came over for a short visit tonight and Andrew was loving the extra attention!

He is doing new cute things every day. I think he’s starting to mimic language a bit, if that’s what you’d call it…When he’s fussing, especially when getting his diaper changed, I will often get him focused by saying, ‘Andrew, what does the cow say?’ followed by a long, ‘MoooOOOOOoooooooo!’ He loves it when I do that! Well today I said, ‘Andrew, what does the cow say?’ and I kid you not, he put his lips into an ‘O’ and made a sort of ‘Moo’ noise! I couldn’t believe it!! I said, ‘MooooOOOOOoooooooo!’ and he mimicked the sound again! He is so clever. He has been saying ‘Ma-ma-ma’ for a while now, says, ‘Ba-ba-ba’ and in the past few days has started saying ‘Da-da-da,’ much to his Daddy’s delight! He will also sometimes say them together, such as, ‘Ma-Ba-Ba’ or ‘Ba-Da-Da.’ It’s amazing how babies learn, I don’t understand how it all works but it’s incredible to witness it happening!
I gave him run of the house for a while today and he loved it. He was crawling around so fast checking everything out! He is intrigued by this table we have in the hallway by the door. I had to take everything off it because he figured out pretty quick how to step on the bottom shelf of it and prop himself waaaay up to try to reach the do-dads on it. Including an oil lamp, which would NOT be good to have thrown to the ground by little baby hands!! He also enjoyed trying to pull open the cupboard doors in the bathroom. What a little scamp!

Over all he’s been really good about having run of the house though. I of course keep a close watch on what he’s up to but for the most part he will just check things out and then sit there and look around, maybe throw a cat toy around that he found hidden somewhere!

He is so cute.
BUT it’s nearly midnight and he could be up crying again at any time, given his recent track record. So I’d better get some shut eye before it’s too late!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Thank my lucky stars

My parents and grandma were in a car accident this morning. It wasn’t super terrible but still, a car accident. My parents were taking my grandma to her doctor’s appointment and all of a sudden they were slammed from behind by a woman changing lanes. She told them she wasn’t speeding, but how could she not have been going too fast if she hit right into them from behind?! She apparently didn’t even apologize or seem the least bit upset about what she had done. Meanwhile, my mom was thrown forward in the backseat and hurt her shoulder. My grandma luckily didn’t get injured considering it could have caused permanent damage to her recent surgery. Even my dad was shaken from the experience. And the woman at fault basically just shrugged about it. After the impact, it took my dad a few seconds (which is a long time in that situation) to get the car to slow down, because getting hit like that caused him to lose control and the car started swerving over the centre lane. LUCKILY there was no oncoming traffic, which is strange considering it was in the morning when people would be heading to work. It should have been busy at that spot but for whatever reason it wasn’t – the stars must have been aligned or something. It could have been so much worse and I am SO grateful that it wasn’t.

Hearing about the accident scared me. I’ve personally (knock on wood) never been in a car accident. I’ve seen them and heard them nearby but have never been in one. It totally freaks me out how someone’s mistake can impact so many people’s lives so quickly. Thank goodness this accident was only a slight scare compared to what it could have been.

Today was a bit of an off day in general. Starting with last night…Andrew was up 6 times from the time he went to bed at about 8:30pm till the time he got up and stayed just after 6am. He was up 3 times between 8:30 and 10:30, then up at 1, 3 (and he stayed up from 3-just after 5), then up an hour later for the day. It got so bad for me with the sleep deprivation thing that around 4am I just left him crying in his crib and went to bed and started sobbing myself! So James got up with him till he went back to sleep after 5. And he just had me feed Andrew but otherwise he took him for me till about 9:30. He took a sick day (and worked a bit from home when he could) so he could help me out. What a good husband I have! I don’t know how I could have got through the day today without him here to help me out. I was able to get a few extra hours sleep and had him helping me out with the boy.

It was Andrew’s second swim lesson this morning but we missed it. For one thing there is no way we’d have been able to get there given the lack of sleep – I’d have had to have been up no later than 7 and out the door with him no later than 8. I might have died along the roadside getting there due to exhaustion!! And then that-time-of-the-month hit me as well so that just sealed the deal that we were skipping class. I felt bad about it since I really do want to take Andrew, but I had already factored in that realistically we’d probably be missing 2 classes due to my period since I don’t reeeally want to go swimming during that time.

I felt like Andrew should have an outing to make up for not going to his lesson (which, by the way, isn’t really a big deal to miss – it’s basically just splashing around and the instructor already said if/when you miss a class, she will recap it the next class if you want her to, so we won’t miss out on learning anything!) so I decided to take him to the aquarium. It was sprinkling with rain but I figured that was OK – we have a plastic thing that goes on the stroller so Andrew would stay dry and I had my umbrella. Unfortunately it started absolutely POURING as soon as we got to the aquarium. We went out to see the belugas since I was just singing Baby Beluga to Andrew this morning, but it was way too wet outside to look for long. We went through all the indoor areas and enjoyed that but it was a bit crowded inside given that no one wanted to be outside! It was fun though and Andrew seemed a bit more interested than in the past. He was most intrigued by the jellyfish!

Cutting this post short to watch Jay Leno =) Time to veg and watch Robin Williams! More tomorrow…

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Always look on the bright side of life

Random tidbit: We watched Jay Leno’s new show last night and I’m happy that Kevin Eubanks went with him, and I am also very happy that he’s still doing Headlines! I love Headlines. It’s pretty much the same show at a new time.

It’s so hard to find the time to do a whole lot from my list of ‘to do’. I don’t know what ‘time management’ means right now. I do a pretty good job most of the time – I mean, I manage to take care of Andrew, make sure we’re getting out and doing new things so he can learn and have new experiences all the time. I do that while also managing to keep the apartment clean and relatively organized. And have supper on the table when James gets home! I manage to get where we’re supposed to be on time and with everything we need. I’m not totally scattered – although my brain often feels like it is. BUT I just don’t have a lot of time to do other things, such as write (I have been posting lately, but I never have time to really delve into anything in my writing or get all the things written out that I really want to). Andrew’s scrapbook and album are in need of work – desperately in need. But having the time AND the energy is key for such projects and having both of those things at the same time doesn’t really happen much at all these days. By the time Andrew is in his crib sleeping, I just want to veg and hang out with James. Maybe this weekend I will find a few hours to do some scrapbooking…

Switching topics now...

I am REALLY feeling worried about the person in my life who is severely depressed and in need of serious help. It’s really hard when the person KNOWS what their issues are and has already had years of intensive therapy to help guide them but they still seem to be sinking into a hole they can’t see themselves getting out of. I feel really sad that they seem to have given up, as if they are doomed to a life of misery. I’ve done every single thing I can possibly think of to help but to no avail. I don’t know what else to do. I have to take a step back but it’s really, really hard to do that. It’s so hard to watch someone you love spiral out of control and show no real effort in trying to change their situation. I know depression makes it very difficult to make positive changes but eventually it’s that or your life. I wish people could see how much they have to live for and focus on what they HAVE rather than what they don’t. I have to stay positive for Andrew and I want to see things in a better light because I think people spend far too much time stressing and being unhappy about things beyond their control and I don’t want to get caught up in the doom and gloom.

We all have bad days. I don’t have life figured out. But I’m sort of starting to realize that I probably never will have it totally figured out, and that’s OK! I’m a lot more content in life than I was before. I still have major concerns about things (it would be weird if I didn’t, given the state of the world in some ways) but I also want to see the glass as half full. There is a lot of pain and strife out there but there is also so much goodness and so much to be grateful for.

The other night James and I watched The Passionate Eye, an episode titled 102 Minutes that Changed the World. It was about the World Trade Center towers collapsing, with unseen footage from many perspectives. It was very, very hard to watch, even though I had of course already seen a lot of footage on it. It was such a devastating event for so many people and I can’t even imagine what it must have been like to be a part of it, both for the people who tragically died in it and for those who survived.

It has stuck with me but I am trying to channel it in a positive light. It really made me put things into better perspective and remember how delicate and precious life is. All those people who died – nearly 3000 people – thought they would be home for dinner that night, brushing their teeth and going to bed to wake up the next morning. No one could have fathomed what was to happen that morning in less than 2 hours time. It’s crazy. Watching the footage felt like watching a movie and it was so disturbing to know it was real. I just thank my lucky stars each day that I have and try to focus on the up side of things because you really never know when it all might be taken away.

I have pictures to sort, but no time to do it now. Andrew is napping and in a little while we have our mom and baby group to go to. But hopefully tonight I can work on the pictures and get some posted. I am in need of a picture post to lighten things up!

Thursday to Sunday night recapped

On Thursday Andrew and I went to Nanaimo. We were lucky that the bus driver let us on to get there, as it was nearly a full bus already so we had to just park the stroller in the isle. People were barely able to get around us, but it worked out. And Andrew was so well behaved the entire ride there, there was not one peep out of him! He was content to just look around and smile at people.

On the ferry, we went to the cafeteria where I got a veggie burger combo. I was STARVING. A ferry worker was kind enough to bring a high chair over to us – it’s hard to balance a tray while pushing a giant stroller AND get a high chair set up! Andrew had a few bites of the burger patty and also a few bites of a French fry. His first taste of a fry – not something I would get in the habit of giving him at this age! He also ate Cheerios, but mostly he played with relish and mustard packets, the lid to a plastic cup, and his sippy cup. All of which he would throw on the ground for me to pick up and the cycle would repeat. But at least he was occupied while I ate.

After that, I took him to the Kid Zone play area. He had fun crawling around, propping himself up on the toys. It was amazing how much easier he was getting around from the last time (a month ago) that we were in there. He was intrigued by the other kids, who were all older than him. Unfortunately he grabbed a little girl’s dress pretty hard and then she was yelling at him every time she laid eyes on him after that! LOL But he had no idea what he had done, or that she was angry! He just stared at her in awe.

It was nice to be in there because it wasn’t very busy, and once Andrew got fussy and tired I was able to nurse him and he fell fast asleep for the rest of the ride.

That night my mom and I went to Superstore and I splurged and got Andrew a bunch more clothes. I say ‘splurged’ because I got quite a few pieces, but everything is so cheap there so it’s not like I spent a whole lot! I got him some really cute pants, including a pair of cords, and a super cute brown sweater with little animals on it! Oh he is going to look SO CUTE in his fall/winter wardrobe =) He just looks so good in everything.

On Friday we pretty much just hung around the house with my parents. We went for a short visit to my grandma’s to check in on her. She had knee replacement surgery at the beginning of the month so she’s not very mobile at the moment. She enjoyed seeing Andrew again and couldn’t believe how much he had changed and grown again since the last visit! I went to get her mail for her and just in the short time I was gone, he managed to rip the basket off her walker. Oh Andrew, what a little scamp!!

Saturday was my mom’s birthday. James came over in the morning, we hung around the house for a while, then my mom and I went out for some girl time. We had brunch at Moxie’s and went to the mall. I got a few things at Reitman’s, and we got Andrew yet more toys from Toys R Us. Mostly toys for when he’s in Nanaimo, like this little walker thing (which he LOVES because he can walk with it – I was so surprised that he was able to use it pretty much right away and doesn’t fall over nearly as much as I thought he would, considering he’s not completely steady on his feet yet!) I couldn’t resist buying him a Brobee toy (he’s a monster character from Yo Gabba Gabba on Treehouse). He was regularly $34.99, on sale for only $9.98! A steal! He is big – half the size of Andrew just about – and when you press his foot he flails his hilarious monster arms around just like he does on the show, and he talks and dances. I LOVE HIM! Everyone said I bought him for me, not for Andrew…but I swear I bought him for BOTH of us! LOL Andrew loves him, today he was grinning at him and then pounced on him while he was dancing and started biting him. LOL Now if that’s not love, I don’t know what is ;)

We ordered food in for my mom’s birthday supper (after Andrew had some pool time in the back yard!) and then sat outside in the yard and had drinks and cake while Andrew slept just inside on the dining room floor. Their yard is so peaceful, with the torches lit over their beautiful garden. It’s so quiet there. In a way, it’s a different world compared to what we’re used to over here.

On Sunday we lounged in the morning, then went over to my uncle’s new place to check it out. Andrew was sooo fussy, it was ridiculous. Basically as soon as we got to his house he was bawling and wouldn’t stop pretty much the entire time we were there. I think he was teething. It was terrible though, especially since my uncle rarely gets to see him and usually he’s as happy as a clam but not for that visit. My uncle’s new place is really impressive though, great ocean views and very bright. We stayed for maybe an hour, then left since Andrew was being so fuss budget-y. We had some lunch, I got all our stuff sorted and packed, and soon enough it was time to go.

We got on the ferry and took Andrew to the Kid Zone play area. He played on one of the toy cars and seemed quite intrigued by the other kids again, but it got so over-crowded in there so we left and found another seat on the ferry. My uncle’s girlfriend was on the ferry with us so we spent some time chatting with her. Luckily she got to hold Andrew when he wasn’t fussing and got to see him as his ‘true’ self where he was happy and playful and interested in what was going on.

It was a long trip though, we got the bus home and he got quite fussy on there but it was a full bus so we couldn’t take him out of the stroller because there was nowhere for us to sit with him. Finally we got home and the rest is history.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Rest in Peace Patrick Swayze

I was so young the first time I watched Dirty Dancing that I really had no idea what was going on in the movie. I remember asking my mom what it meant to get 'knocked up' and when Baby's dad had to give Penny an illegal abortion, I had no idea what that was.

But I do remember knowing just how cute Patrick Swayze was, and how amazing he was at dancing. Dirty Dancing is one of my all-time favourite movies today.

Ghost is another favourite. Which I just realized is going to be kind of creepy to watch, now that Patrick Swayze is gone.

He suffered from pancreatic cancer for a number of years, and that particular type of cancer is apparently one of the worst in terms of pain. So at least he is no longer having to deal with that pain, but it doesn't make it any easier to hear that he is gone.

RIP Patrick Swayze, you will be missed.

Swimming like a fish!

I have to go back to last Thursday and recap what we did from then till now…but for this post I’ll just focus on today’s events (so far).

I got up just before 7am…So annoying, considering Andrew was still sleeping! I don’t want to encourage him getting up earlier than when he wakes up on his own! But today was his first swim lesson so I had to get up early to get ready. Of course as soon as I came out of the bedroom, he was awake and standing at his crib, waiting for me to come in and get him. I thought I would feed him right away (he had fed last at 3:30am…unfortunately it wasn’t a ‘sleep through the night’ night) but we picked up his new toy last night and James put it together so he could see it all set up and he couldn’t think to feed – he wanted to play! It felt like Christmas morning. He was so intrigued by his new toy! It’s big, although it fits perfectly where I wanted to put it by the window. It’s the house thing I posted about recently, that we ordered from Babies R Us. It’s AMAZING. Well worth the price of $130! Not that he’s played with it a ton yet, since he just got it, but I’m sure it’s going to be a toy he will get a lot of use out of. It has so many functions – teaching numbers, letters, singing songs. You can turn the outdoor light on, ring the door bell (with various ringtones), send mail through the mail slot, and so much more! It’s really cool. I found myself wanting to play with it too!!

The door opens and closes, so baby can go through the door to the other side and there’s a different set of toys and things on each side. I didn’t think Andrew would understand the door right away but it was one of the first things he started doing – opening and closing the door! He did start to go through it once but he fell…He has to grow into this toy a bit since it’s actually meant for kids a bit older than him. But so far he seems to be enjoying it.

I feel kind of sick right now so I’m going to make this a quick post…I don’t know if I’m coming down with something or I’m just physically beyond exhausted from travelling (back from Nanaimo last night), not getting much sleep, and doing a lot of physical exercise today already. We walked to the pool, which took about 40 minutes, walking at a fair clip. Once there, I had to leave the stroller upstairs and carry Andrew and all our stuff downstairs to the change room. It was a bit awkward getting sorted but I managed to get us both ready. Before the class, Andrew got to meet a few of the other babies. It was cute watching them interact! The class was a lot of fun and Andrew took to the water right away. We sang and splashed and learned how to prop baby on the side of the pool, get in, and then lift baby in. Andrew was having so much fun splashing the water and seemed amused by the singing and bouncing about! It was a work out for the moms because we were crouching in the water (it only gets to 2 ½ feet at its deepest point) and walking in a crouched position quite a bit. After the class, I got Andrew changed and then myself, then he wanted to feed so I nursed him for probably about 20 minutes before we left. We walked to Safeway, got a few groceries, then came home. It might not sound like a lot but it was a tad on the exhausting side for me! The swim class is really fun though and I know we’ll get into a routine of getting ready etc so it won’t seem like as much of a production (hopefully!)

Since getting home, Andrew played with the house toy and then had some macaroni and cheese (which he loved!), nursed some more, and now he’s napping. Given the way I’m feeling right now (a bit light-headed, tired, kind of icky all over), I think I’ll lay on the couch and veg, and maybe fall asleep. Who knows how much longer he’ll nap for, but he’s got to be tired after our outing!

It’s so much fun getting him involved in new activities and watching him react to his surroundings. Everything he does is so darn cute!!!

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

A lazy sort of day

We’re having a lazy sort of day. It really feels like fall, it’s dark and dreary outside and its been raining on and off since this morning. We changed into fresh jammies but I decided we’d have a stay-in-our-jammies day.

I don’t know if the weather is getting to Andrew or if it’s just a fluke, but he’s been napping a lot today. I just hope this doesn’t mean he’ll be up through the night. We’re now at 4 nights in a row of sleeping through the night and I don’t want to break that cycle!! He did get up just after midnight BUT I had only just fallen asleep literally a few minutes earlier than that, so getting him back to bed just after 12:30, I was able to fall asleep almost as soon as my head hit the pillow and didn’t wake up till after 7. After feeding him, James watched him so I could go back to sleep till 8:30. What a difference it makes to be getting better sleep. I still get exhausted in the early evening but sometimes a coffee gives me the extra boost I need to finish up the day!

Something Andrew did today that felt like a sort of ‘milestone’ moment was playing ball with me. He would push the ball back to my hands after I pushed it toward him. He’s done it before but it seemed more like a fluke when it happened before – today he seemed to more consciously be pushing the ball, knowing it was a game we were playing.

So I’ve started reading The Time Traveler’s Wife. I want to see the movie so I thought I’d better read the book first. If I see the movie first, it’s unlikely I’d ever get around to reading the book. I’m only about 30 pages in but so far so good. Maybe I’ll go read a few pages now before the babe is up again and demanding my full attention =)

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Old hat

My aunt came over today and we took Andrew to the swings at the park. He was all smiles as soon as we put him into the baby swing. It’s SO cute the way he holds on while he’s swinging. Once again he was intrigued with the older kids and their ability to run around and play on the big kid playground. It’s hard to believe that next summer he’ll be running around too.

We went for lunch at a little café on the sea wall. The panini was delicious and filling – I was so happy not to have to think about cooking a lunch! Andrew had a few very small bits of tortilla chip and that kept him occupied for most of the lunch – although he did have to do some nursies and then when he got really fussy, we decided we’d better leave. We walked a bit and he had a bit of a cry and then he was out like a light! Soon it was time to say goodbye to my aunt and head to the mom and baby group meet up.

I was hoping to see some familiar faces from spring time, and see how the other babies had grown like Andrew has. But out of probably 10-12 of us there, I didn’t know any of the other moms and babies! They were all newborns. One baby was about 5 months, otherwise they were all 3 months and under. Some were even just a few weeks old! So while all the other babies just laid on their blankets and stared up at the ceiling, Andrew was refusing to stay on the mats and was chasing after anything and everything. He even darted across the room towards another baby’s toy as the mother held it in front of her baby’s face! LOL He was a menace, but a happy and cute one =) We knew one of the volunteers from where we go to get Andrew’s immunizations, so he was playing with him for a while.

It felt strange being the one with the oldest baby in the room! When we were going in the spring time, Andrew was usually one of the youngest babies, or else in the middle. We went around in a circle talking about good things that are happening in our lives right now, as well as challenges. I found there was interest in hearing my opinions and advice on certain challenges being faced. It seemed sort of funny to me that people thought of me as the more experienced one! I mean, compared to them I am, I’m just not used to that! It was kind of nice though. As wonderful as I think it might be at times to have the baby who just lays there not doing a whole lot (I thought I was tired then but now I imagine all I could do while not having to worry about what baby was up to because he couldn’t really be up to much at all!!) I love the stage Andrew is at now. I love that I know so much more about him now – his likes, his dislikes. And I see him doing so much more. Even his crawling has really improved in the past little while. He can be crawling along and then get himself sitting with ease, so I’m not as worried about him falling over. He still takes tumbles of course but not nearly as much.

He was getting a bit fussy at the meet up but then we started singing and signing the song and he watched me intently as I sang to him. He calmed right down! I can’t wait to start taking him to storytime/sing-along in the coming weeks. We actually have quite a few activities to look forward to each week, which definitely will help break up the day. There are so many groups and activities to get involved with in this area, it’s actually quite amazing.

Anyway, time for night nights for this person! Andrew has already been sleeping for a few hours – lets hope he sleeps through the night for the 4th night in a row! That would be a first…!!!!

Monday, September 07, 2009

I hope a new pattern of SLEEPING is forming!

Last night Andrew slept straight through for nearly 12 hours! He just got up before 7:30 this morning. I can’t believe it! And he was so happy when he woke up, he voiced that he was ready to get up but he wasn’t fussy.

What’s really cute is that last night after he went to bed, I put a few toys into his toy box that he hasn’t played with for a while. One was fairly deep in the box because I piled a bunch of other things on top of it afterwards when I was cleaning up more of his stuff. When he crawled to the box this morning to play, he actually picked out the three toys he hadn’t seen for a while. I thought it was quite clever, especially given the one that wasn’t easy to get to. He purposely wanted it out because he hadn’t played with it for some time, whereas all the other toys are out on a daily basis!

It’s amazing when you think that just some MONTHS ago, he couldn’t even roll over on his own, let alone sit up, crawl, work on standing, or decide on his own which toys to play with.

And now!

Sunday, September 06, 2009

I've got the theme song for Littlest Hobo stuck in my head and I have no idea why!

Tonight we watched the first part of a 2 part miniseries called Guns. It explores rising gun violence in Canada. I found it really gritty and almost hard to watch at times, but we will definitely be tuning in for the 2nd part tomorrow night.

I like watching Canadian shows for a change. Though I did mention to James that I reeeally want to start watching some happier-content shows. I feel like everything we watch is so negative. For example, we just finished watching Dexter Season 3 recently. An amazing show and I can’t wait to see the 4th season start up, but the point is that I also need some uplifting shows in my life! I guess there’s always Treehouse – when I watch shows with Andrew there’s always a positive message!

We didn’t end up doing a whole lot today. I really felt fall starting to creep into my bones today. Not because I felt cold at all but it’s just this feeling. Most likely a result of the greyness outside – the clouds, the bouts of rain. Sigh. I am already starting to miss summer, and regret that my flip flops are going to have to be retired soon till next spring.

We did go do a grocery shop, and got ingredients for eggplant parmesan, which James made for us and it turned out DELICIOUS. Mmmm! The best part is that we have leftovers. I also made a pot of chilli so we’ve got frozen meals prepared for days when I don’t have time or energy to cook, and leftovers for the next day or two in the fridge. Yay!

Andrew enjoyed himself a little eggplant parmesan – how cute is that?! He actually ate it and seemed to like it. He’s been doing a bit better food-wise the past few days. Today he had cereal biscuits with water (so, basically mush) with yogurt, some cheese, later some yogurt on its own, cottage cheese, and the eggplant parmesan. I think he had a few Cheerios as well. I can’t remember if there was anything else. Yesterday he had an assortment of veggies and fruit, cereal, yogurt and even veggie sausage and hash browns! So he’s getting some variety, although he really needs to eat a bit more of things. I think he slept through the night last night because I filled his belly with his cereal mixed with a baby vanilla custard. I think he needs something more than just breast milk at night to get him satisfied for a longer period. Unfortunately tonight he fell asleep before I could get him anything like that – so if/when he wakes up tonight again, he’s being fed baby food before getting nursies! Hopefully this plan will work and he’ll start sleeping better through the night.

I had a half hour nap today but I was pretty tired all day long – yes, Andrew slept through last night – but he was up before 6:30 this morning. Tomorrow I’m hoping James will take him early and I can sleep longer. I hate feeling such a lack of get-up-and-go. There’s so much I want to do but all I can do is think about it till I get the energy to get at it!

Hangin' with the fam

I’ve read a few stories recently of mothers losing a child at a young age. A 2 year old being struck out of nowhere by a car, a young baby dying after having been born premature. It’s almost too much for me to even read about it. My heart goes out to parents who lose their children so young – or at any age for that matter. Children should never die before their parents. I don’t know what I would do if I was to lose Andrew. I don’t think I’d be able to survive without him. If that makes me sound totally weak, so be it. How could I possibly go on if he weren’t here? My heart would shatter into a million pieces. I can’t even think about it. All I can do is thank my lucky stars that he IS here and thank my lucky stars that he was born so healthy. As much as I was desperate for his arrival, I think it’s actually good that he was 8 days late. The over-ripeness made him that much stronger and healthier!

Last night we had his aunt and uncle over – James’ brother and girlfriend. They even changed a poopy diaper, putting them high on the list for babysitter ability! It was a great visit. I love having family visit with Andrew and get to know him better. I want him to be close to his aunts and uncles.

James completed the move for his company yesterday (with the help of the movers of course!) and once everything was in the new space, Andrew and I headed over to have a look. I was impressed – it could use work but it’s far better than where they were before. The last place had at least 50 rather rickety stairs and only a service elevator we weren’t allowed to use, so when Andrew and I went to visit it was really difficult to get up to the office. We also had to leave the stroller downstairs by the door and I was always afraid, given the area, that a homeless person would come in and either steal the whole thing to sell it or steal my valuables out of it. That sounds bad but it really isn’t the best area – the homeless are addicts and therefore more likely to steal because of their need to satisfy their addictions.

Anyway, the new place isn’t far from the old one but I like it better. While James was getting the payment sorted for the movers, Andrew and I went into the main office area. I was appalled by how dirty their desks were! So Andrew crawled around and explored the ground while I washed all of the desks.

I had brought James a beer, since I figured he could use a drink after the move – and I brought some Sangria for myself! We had our bevies, then hit up a small cafe nearby for some sandwiches. I had a bocconcini sammy that was quite tasty (although of course has nothing on Baguette Time!) Andrew was loving the cheese – I was worried he’d be squirmy in his stroller but as long as I shared my sandwich with him, he was happy =)

We came home and that’s when N&M came over. It turned out to be a good day, despite James sort of having to work for a lot of it.

Not sure what’s in the cards for today. Crummy weather makes it more difficult to make plans. Oh fall, what have you done to summer?

Saturday, September 05, 2009

Long weekend

I’m feeling slightly refreshed at the moment. Andrew was up through the night, but James took him for me in the morning so I could get some extra zzz’s. Woke up to feed him just after 9, then back to sleep for an hour. I could always use more but just that little extra goes a long way.

I’m in a good mood, despite that James has to spend the majority of our Saturday moving…His company is moving a block away from where they were before and it got organized for today which is absolutely RIDICULOUS but whatever. At least it’s a long weekend so we still have 2 days to enjoy together.

I hope the rain stops and the clouds move away…Come again some other day, like how about half way to never? The weather has been so amazing this summer, you could probably count on one hand how many times it has rained since May. Its been amazing – not so much for the plants and trees but for getting out and about its been wonderful. I’m hoping to get out with Andrew later but I’ll be less likely to do that if it’s crummy out.

Right now Boy is going between biting my knee and watching Treehouse! Toopy and Binoo is on at the moment. Oh, now Andrew’s crawling around and playing with his toys. He has taken to often wanting to be holding onto some little toy. Last night while he was feeding before bed he was rattling a little toy around! He is so cute. And I’m not the least biased ;)

I want to go to IKEA soon…but not having a car is going to make it a bit of a pain in the arse. It’ll take about an hour just to get there by bus/skytrain/another bus and then undoubtedly Andrew will be tired of being strapped into his stroller so he’ll fuss and squirm and want to be carried and blah blah we should probably wait till someone can drive us there! I just want to get little things but James said he could probably expense a few items for the new office if I want to do a little decorating =) Which of course I would love to do! Just a few pictures and plants and that sort of thing. Nothing too extravagant but I think I could do so much with so little!!

I want to get Andrew a little toy box and then paint it and maybe stencil his name on it or some such thing. Maybe it could be part of his Christmas or birthday present (the toy box with some sort of cool toy(s) inside!)

I was going to wait till Xmas but I couldn’t resist, and recently ordered him this from babies r us.

It looks/sounds like something that will keep him well occupied and learning while he plays. I’m hoping the size of it will work near the window in the living room so he won’t be constantly grabbing and pulling on the blinds anymore. I can’t wait till it arrives and he can start using it! I think he’ll love the fact that he’ll be able to stand and prop himself against it while he has play time. He’s spoiled, yes, but he loves his toys and really seems to learn a lot when we play with them together. And it will be a good toy to keep him busy with – hopefully – on rainy fall days =)

Friday, September 04, 2009

Keeping true to my promise, this post might INCLUDE Andrew but it’s ABOUT fire!

About an hour ago Andrew and I were playing in the living room when I heard a smoke alarm going off on our floor. It happens from time to time – I don’t freak out over someone’s smoke alarm, although I do keep an ear peeled to make sure it goes off shortly after. It didn’t, and if anything it started to sound louder (which is strange) so I went and looked through the peep hole. I couldn’t see anything, but through the crack of the door I could smell smoke. This DID freak me out!

I threw some clothes on in a matter of seconds (if there were flames licking obviously I’d rush out in my nightgown, but realistically I think it’s better to have something a little more appropriate on! In our old apartment, the one with the arsonist and therefore MANY fires as well as false alarms) I remember a woman once came out in a sheer leopard print mini-housecoat. I didn’t want to be that person! Not that I have a leopard print ANYTHING, but you know what I mean!!)

Anyway, I grabbed Andrew’s diaper bag, picked him up, grabbed my cell phone and we were out the door. By this time the building fire alarm was going off, and given I could smell smoke right outside our door I knew it wasn’t a false alarm. I should point out that I DID feel the door first and did what I could to make sure it was safe to open the door (I remember what I learned from fire safety in elementary school!) I felt a slight panic inside when I opened the door and the suite right next to ours had the door wide open and it was obvious the smoke was coming from that suite. My biggest fear was thinking about our two cats being left behind. For one thing we’re not actually supposed to have cats here so unless the situation seemed really dire, I don’t think it would be a good idea to take them with us (obviously if I thought they were going to go up in flames or die from the smoke I would try to do something for them). But realistically, too, how could I carry Andrew AND two cats?! That would be impossible and ultimately my goal is to get Andrew to safety above all else. He was really good about the whole thing, was just wondering what was going on but didn’t react nervously. Probably because I didn’t either, really – despite feeling freaked on the inside I tend to remain pretty calm outwardly in these situations (most of the time, at least!)

We got downstairs and as it turns out, our neighbour had forgot about breakfast on the stove and the oil had overheated. It was smoking pretty badly so she put the frying pan in the sink and just the sudden movement caused a flame and then, while the flame was gone, it was just a LOT of smoke. So in a bit of a panic of trying to clear the air, she opened the door to her suite and propped it to keep it open (never a good idea in a fire/smoke situation!) Of course, the smoke entering the main hallway caused the whole building’s alarm to go off.

It worries me a bit, given they’re our new neighbours and this happens fairly soon after they move in – although I also know that it could happen to anyone, really, and it’s unlikely to happen again because she was so distraught, I am sure she won’t forget about something like that ever again!

Interestingly, we had a chat yesterday when it was the building’s annual fire DRILL. LOL We just went through all of this yesterday (to get us prepared in case of a real fire) and then today it happens (sort of).

I like our new neighbours and the fact that they have a one year old – a potential friend for Andrew. I feel bad for her because she was so upset about causing such a disruption and worry for so many people in the building. I’d feel the same if I had done something like that. But live and learn, right? It could have been a lot worse.

I admit, I do have a fear of fire after all we went through in our last place. But I have to put this into perspective and know it really could have been a lot worse. I guess it was a test and a reminder of how careful we all have to be.

Thankfully there is no smoke damage in our place. Hopefully that will be the last of having to rush down the stairs to the sound of alarms for a very long time! (Forever would be nice!)

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Let there be sleep!

I got less than 4 hours sleep last night. I was SURE that because of how much Andrew was up through the night, he would have had a good long nap today. Not so. He literally did not even sleep one wink the whole day through. He would feed and immediately want something else, he wouldn’t close his eyes for fear he might miss out on something!

By 8pm he went from overtired to zonked and fell asleep – although he’s already been up twice since then to feed and drift back. I hope SOOOOO much that he will sleep for a good amount of time tonight – how about all night, Andrew – that sure would be a nice treat for Momma!

I think his teeth are bothering him. For the most part the teething process has seemed to come easy for him, but I have a feeling that is what’s bugging him. Of course, not being able to ask him what’s wrong, I can’t know for sure. Poor little guy. He so rarely cries for any length of time. I feel so bad for him when he’s sobbing but you should see how adorable his face is when it’s all squished up in full sob! It’s sad but oh so cute at the same time! He seems so much smaller when he’s crying like that. He has never really enjoyed being held like a baby, as in cradled in my arms being rocked or whatever. He generally squirms and gets annoyed that he’s being babied! But since last night I’ve cradled him a bit and he has taken to it a little better, that’s how out of sorts he’s been.

One thing that really helped him calm down today was me singing Hey Diddle Diddle to him. I think it’s his favourite nursery rhyme! He put his face so close to mine and watched my mouth move as I sang. Then at the end I would smile and say, ‘Yaaaaay!’ and give him a kiss and this would make him grin and sometimes even do a little squeal. He would be full on sobbing and then just this simple little song would make everything better. I love that he doesn’t have a clue that I don’t have a very great singing voice, he loves it anyway. I love how he cuddles into me and feels so relaxed in my arms. How much he seems to love his Momma.

OK my next post is going to be about something other than baby, I promise =)

Finally, someone who cares!

Almost 2 am…been awake for half an hour after sleeping for an hour and a half. Ahhh, why oh why can’t I get a full nights sleep?! Andrew was up and had a feed and cuddles and has gone back to bed but he’s been stirring so I don’t want to go back to bed if the monitor is going to continue going off. He’s not needing to get up again at this point but I can’t sleep when I’m anticipating the noise of the monitor clicking on…

Tonight (last night, technically) we found a new doctor, thanks to the recommendation of one of the other moms in the mom/baby group we go to. As it turns out, she, too, had been going to the same woman in Yaletown that we started going to after our time with our midwife ended. She felt the same about this woman as I did. She’s rather cold and abrupt in her approach. Uncaring is probably the best description. Just a total lack of care. Which of course makes a person totally uncomfortable addressing issues, which is kind of the purpose of having a doctor…

Since this doctor is currently taking new patients, I thought it was a good idea to go for a consultation visit and get the ball rolling to see about starting up with him. Boy am I ever glad we did. He is absolutely AMAZING. The old-school type of attitude where he is totally thorough and actually acts like he cares about us as individual people. Yet I would say he’s maybe in his late thirties or forty-ish. It’s actually like a dream come true to have found him, as cheesy as that might sound. He spent 40 minutes with us and asked James and I extensively about our health histories and wants us both to have blood work done – not because we’re thinking there’s something wrong but to be checked up so he knows for himself where we’re at with things. And he actually held Andrew, weighed him (he’s still at around 21lbs, which I suspected given I just weighed him the other day!), measured him (he’s 68 cms long, or about 2 ft 3 in). He also checked his hips and reflexes and heart. Which are all, of course, perfect =) Like I said, he showed an interest in all of us and we left feeling so good to have found such a wonderful doctor who happens to be very conveniently located in our general neighbourhood.

Yay!! I am still in shock since it’s near impossible to find a good doctor in these parts but it looks like it has finally happened for us after so many years of doing the painful walk-in clinic thing.

So that’s something to feel good about.

But more sleep would feel even better…time to go give falling back to sleep a whirl!

Tuesday, September 01, 2009


Those of you who have access to my facebook can see these pictures there, but I thought I would do a picture post seeing as I so rarely seem to put any on here these days...which is something that must change.

A backwards glimpse into our August...Backwards because it goes from most recent to oldest, but I dont feel like rearranging the order so this is what you get!



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